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Skip navigation! Story from Mothership. Giving birth is an intense and painful experience … but new parents are masturbating sooner than some might expect.

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Hands up please. No one? Even if you are the most charismatic, confident, good-looking person out there, you may still feel a little uncertainty in your mind.

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In case you didn't get the memo, May is National Masturbation Month. It's the one month a year we honor the beloved activity that unites us all: masturbation. Masturbation isn't just some of the best sex you'll have in your life, but it's the safest and it doesn't require another person. Of course, you can throw your partner into the mix and practice mutual masturbation — which is always a blast — but a partner isn't necessary to enjoy it.

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The French for masturbate is the verb masturber Internet French Class. French for masturbate is the regular ER verb masturberlaid out here in the most practically formatted verb table. So, if you want to know how to say masturbate in French, how to express the verb in all the main tenses, here it is.

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When I was 7 or 8, I hoisted myself into a tree and accidentally gave myself an orgasm. I only know that it made complete sense. I went at it with un-self-conscious zeal for a year or so, until I realized that it was kind of unusual and normalized my behavior by switching over to a more boring method.

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My fixation on the subject started a few months ago, while sitting around a brunch table, two or three Bloody Marys in. Someone volunteered their, ahem, methods for dealing with a particularly bad day, and one by one, each of us admitted to wanking at work—regularly. Male, female, gay, straight, we were all going to town during business hours.

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If I have some spare time and want to relax, I usually spend it watching Netflix or doing a face mask. I like it on occasion, but I can happily do without. But when some science-y types recommended masturbation breaks at work — as in wanking in the office during work hours — as a way to improve focus and be a happier, better employee, I was intrigued.

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